They can smell it. Like so many other animals, your children can smell the sign of weakness and strike at the soft underbelly of your psyche. Why, you might ask, would they do such a thing? If I had that answer, I’d feel like I had unlocked one of the great mysteries of life itself.
This was supposed to be the easier week, the one where finals were over and grades were in and I could slowly slide into a less hectic routine. Even maybe, just maybe, find a moment to myself in the studio. But alas Rob’s job heated up to the point of working 14 hour days. Leaving at 8am and getting home 11:00pm exhausted and in no way prepared to deal with the boys in the wee hours of morning. We had, in fact, a nice run of nights where they slept through to almost 7am. Enough nights in a row to let my guard down, and pretend that they were somehow past all that. Hahahaha (insert evil laugh here).
If you’ve never experienced 2am in Stimville, I’ll only briefly describe it.. Nathan and Xander both have an equally annoying, but differing verbal stim. Nathan will say “eeeeeee”, at a pich that would bring any dog to its knees, repetitively for – well, hours. Xander decides on a nonsensical phrase that he too will repeat with the frequency of a metronome. “a moooo ga gee”. Put these together while I contort my body to fit into their little bed and– voila, Stimville at its best. It teaches one a degree of patience and stamina that you had no idea you were even capable of. I think about people who have been tortured, and for the most split second can imagine what it’s like. By hour two (and yes, I do wear earplugs) I can’t imagine surviving another moment. Nathan finally lies down, Xander follows a short while later. Silence, at last.
But here’s why I really wrote this. I am amazed how fast it fades away. Those boys wake up in the morning to an exhausted mother who would likely allow them to eat potato chips for breakfast and run naked though the yard if they would just allow me a cup of coffee. A huge smile appear on their faces and proceed to do something completely goofey and amazing. And like the Grinch at the end of the story, my heart grows three sizes that day. For all the rough times, the moments of joy weigh so very much more. Wouldn’t change them for all the coffee in the world.
I’m officially off night duty tonight when Rob finishes work for the week. No longer single in Stimville, I will not be surprised that they’ll sleep through the night, for there will be reinforcements and they smell that too!
